It's Been Real, World Politics

To stay true with the lingo I’ve been using in conversation, it is a bit silly that the semester is coming to a close. 

I have changed. Back home, my best friend and I would always talk about how college would be a wondrous time to redefine the versions of ourselves to be what we want to be without any past reputations or home town expectations holding us back. It has been quite an experience to see how we are revamping our old selves so quickly.

From the second I stepped onto campus I have tried to be more present- to be the better Noël and define the version that AU would know me as to how I want to be perceived and the qualities I want to have. This is not to say I’m a completely different person, only that I can’t say I am a fan of being forever identified with New Jersey and all that. Washington D.C. represents so much for me. It is a new home and a place that is filled with opportunity constantly pushing myself to be better. 

However, through this, I have let go of many parts that used to represent a larger part of myself. When seeing a couple of friends over Thanksgiving break, I found out how much I had changed… I missed discussing politics and absurd IR theories at 2 am in the sky lounge. I am one of the lucky ones in that my college experience has made it feel more like home in 4 months than New Jersey. 

Academically, I was terrified of AU and international relations and honestly, I still kind of am. One of my first reflections was about being a small fish in a big pond. Since I had close to no experience in what IR entailed, I was hit by a big dose of “imposter syndrome.” Coming here, especially a part of the gloscho community was intimidating beyond measure. Although I still have times of doubt and fear, I can understand the growth that being pushed in my beliefs and skills has resulted in. 

I can see how the idea of being a small fish in a big pond is kind of absurd… One thing (among many) I learned from this semester was how relative everything is and the ideas of comparing yourself to others. Everyone’s pond is different and there are factors that we cannot control (climate change, drought… etc.) but as long as we all stay aware that there are ponds different from our own, all we can do is just keep swimming !

World Politics has been like no other course. Between the energy and diverse structure PTJ provided the class and the insane discussions we had, I continue to be exhilarated by how large the expanse of IR is and how many paths there are to explore. I only wish that PTJ could switch to lecturing our International Research class next semester instead of next year. That being said, I already cannot wait to return to AU after winter break and reunite with everyone as we take on another semester!