Reflection Week #15

And just like that we're at our last reflective blog post! What a wild ride it has been. Honestly the semester flew by—it really seems like I moved in last week! 

My plan for this week was to reflect on the second simulation—even though it seems like it was weeks ago it was just this past Monday! For the simulation, Noël, Molly, and I represented South Pacific Business Development. The group focused on micro-finance and our team came up with a plan that balanced the climate initiatives of the resolution with our own economic interests. We were quite pleased with our plan as we assumed it would be well-received and not have a lot of controversy, but we were in for a big surprise. For a significant amount of the debate period on Monday the discussion centered around dredging and the sustainability of it, not leaving any space for our group to really contribute to the conversation. 

Once we were finally able to propose our amendment, it was almost immediately shot down, leaving us feeling rather defeated. We had even come up with counterarguments to address the concerns and cons brought up during debate, but we were never able to use them. Here's what we had typed up on the document to gather our thoughts on the debate on our amendment:

We’re not representing them, we have pre-existing micro-finance operations in them and they wouldn’t be using their resources but rather adding workers from ¼ of the Kiribati population. Additionally, the integration process is not set on moving I-Kiribati’s only to the previously mentioned countries, however, this plan would be more beneficial for the people to begin an integration process before the island is completely under water.

• Also we are financed by China and Japan so…
• We have partnership with countries
• They’re going to be consulted and there will be talks with the UN
• Also it’s not all people going to those places, it’s only a quarter of population at first
• Literally integration problems are happening with Syrian refugees right now - they can’t work and are forced into poverty

Even though we didn't get to share all of these thoughts and ideas with the rest of the class, I am glad that I got the be part of this group. I think it's important to realize that within any one issue there are so many different interests and finding a compromise that all the interests agree on is very hard. It may have been frustrating, but the simulation still made me very excited to actually work in this field one day. I find it so interesting and find a lot of value in making compromises because how else is anything going to get done in our country, let alone our world?

World Politics has truly been a wild ride and I will definitely miss this class but I'm excited to build upon what I've learned here over the rest of my college and life experience! Thanks PTJ (:

As Soon As I Get Home: Tangible and Intangible Home- Week 15

I am a few days from being home. A few days from being on my turf, and a few days from being in my Arena. I sit here thinking, and I realize that the privilege of choosing to go home is a privilege that not many people have the choice of just choosing to do. Some people come from places where war is the deterring factor and a barrier to their ability to reunite with their beloved homeland. For centuries when humans have been uprooted from home or have migrated by choice,  people carry home with them through beliefs, customs, language, and tradition. However, what happens when the ability to carry home is taken from you or restricted? What happens when this freedom is challenged. 

In "Who Stole The Dream" the Joilani struggled with their concept of home, and during the most difficult times in their lives they desired to simply return to life as they knew it. In the process, though home rested in their hearts like a bittersweet memory, and they believed that "a Joilani homeland still lived". From the surface this statement could be interpreted as literal, but when observing it under the lens of an intangible concept of home, which is the who which can't be taken. It is the intangible home that is the home to all memories and traditions. It is the adaptable concept of home that is flexible and creates confidential ways to experience home. One of the hardest realities when having to cope with the lost of tangible home with the  concept of intangible home is that during the acceptance of the coping mechanism, one may be subjected to negative experiences that contradict one's values.  Despite this reality, one must remember that home is not only tangible, but it is where the heart is. There are aspects of home that no one can take from you, and though the Joilani experienced a rough plight, if they look deeper inside themselves, they will realize that the true essence of home is with them in every moment because it's within.  This doesn't make up for the unfortunate state of their reality, but it introduces a different perspective. 

It's Been Real, World Politics

To stay true with the lingo I’ve been using in conversation, it is a bit silly that the semester is coming to a close. 

I have changed. Back home, my best friend and I would always talk about how college would be a wondrous time to redefine the versions of ourselves to be what we want to be without any past reputations or home town expectations holding us back. It has been quite an experience to see how we are revamping our old selves so quickly.

From the second I stepped onto campus I have tried to be more present- to be the better Noël and define the version that AU would know me as to how I want to be perceived and the qualities I want to have. This is not to say I’m a completely different person, only that I can’t say I am a fan of being forever identified with New Jersey and all that. Washington D.C. represents so much for me. It is a new home and a place that is filled with opportunity constantly pushing myself to be better. 

However, through this, I have let go of many parts that used to represent a larger part of myself. When seeing a couple of friends over Thanksgiving break, I found out how much I had changed… I missed discussing politics and absurd IR theories at 2 am in the sky lounge. I am one of the lucky ones in that my college experience has made it feel more like home in 4 months than New Jersey. 

Academically, I was terrified of AU and international relations and honestly, I still kind of am. One of my first reflections was about being a small fish in a big pond. Since I had close to no experience in what IR entailed, I was hit by a big dose of “imposter syndrome.” Coming here, especially a part of the gloscho community was intimidating beyond measure. Although I still have times of doubt and fear, I can understand the growth that being pushed in my beliefs and skills has resulted in. 

I can see how the idea of being a small fish in a big pond is kind of absurd… One thing (among many) I learned from this semester was how relative everything is and the ideas of comparing yourself to others. Everyone’s pond is different and there are factors that we cannot control (climate change, drought… etc.) but as long as we all stay aware that there are ponds different from our own, all we can do is just keep swimming !

World Politics has been like no other course. Between the energy and diverse structure PTJ provided the class and the insane discussions we had, I continue to be exhilarated by how large the expanse of IR is and how many paths there are to explore. I only wish that PTJ could switch to lecturing our International Research class next semester instead of next year. That being said, I already cannot wait to return to AU after winter break and reunite with everyone as we take on another semester!

What is the purpose of life? -- Week 15

I just laughed to myself when typing the title of my reflection post this week. It looks like an ironic semester-ending joke satirizing the idea of these reflection posts, and although it probably should be, its not: I really want to discuss the meaning of life in this post.

After our last reading, I had the opportunity to reflect on the idea of human nature and the implications of our semester on the idea of "eat or be eaten". After talking with Xandra this week, we came to an agreement that although perfection is impossible to reach, and that believing in the goodness of society or its potential to break the power-atrocity complex is naive, there is a solution in how to go about our lives. If we knowingly allow ourselves to be idealistic in a way, and work tirelessly to improve something in the world, its possible for us to make a positive shift, no matter how small. Each choice we make in our lives, each failure, each success -- they all seem to matter so much to us... but reality is that our lives are so insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe. While this could be a discouraging and self-defeating statement, it is also freeing in a way. The power that one gets when they zoom out and put all of that which is known to them in perspective is a dangerous one to wield and has led many educated people to suicide.

Despite this, I believe that this power of perspective can also be incredibly beneficial. It reminds me of a story I once heard from my Rabbi during Rosh Hashannah (Jewish New Year) services. I found a version online (https://www.cityyear.org/about-us/culture-values/founding-stories/starfish-story) and included it here:
"A young girl was walking along a beach upon which thousands of starfish had been washed up during a terrible storm. When she came to each starfish, she would pick it up, and throw it back into the ocean. People watched her with amusement. 

She had been doing this for some time when a man approached her and said, “Little girl, why are you doing this? Look at this beach! You can’t save all these starfish. You can’t begin to make a difference!” The girl seemed crushed, suddenly deflated. But after a few moments, she bent down, picked up another starfish, and hurled it as far as she could into the ocean. Then she looked up at the man and replied, “Well, I made a difference to that one!” 

The old man looked at the girl inquisitively and thought about what she had done and said. Inspired, he joined the little girl in throwing starfish back into the sea. Soon others joined, and all the starfish were saved."

While the ending of this story is a little corny or idealistic, the message really hit home for me and I think it captures a lot about why each one of us was put on this planet.

To extend this to my current situation, a college student with aspirations for the future, working day by day to make something of my life, is important. I have to remember that while my current grades, relationships, habits, health, etc will affect my future dramatically, I shouldn't be afraid to take risks and think about things in the context of what will A) make the world a better place and B) make myself and others happier in our own lives, rather than each and every small thing in life. 

So, I know that this post wasn't a revolutionary world-changing answer to the eternal question, "What is the purpose of life?", but I think that it explains a little bit that could give any one of us control over our own purposes and a sense of calculated, cautious optimism about the future. 

Stop Being Pessimistic: The Power - Atrocity Cycle is NOT Inevitable

I hear you. The power-atrocity cycle is inevitable. People are inherently selfish. Things supposedly  can get better, but it is all a facade. Great. Wonderful. Perfection is impossible. Let's all go contemplate the helplessness, hopelessness of life. We have been doing it all semester. 
In a way I agree. Perfection is impossible. As Jacob convinced me, there are always trade-offs in a seemingly good thing. And maybe, in the long term, improvement in the human condition will always prove itself a fickle thing. I could go around in circles with you on this topic all day. In fact, I would love to. Nevertheless, I think there are valid points to be made supporting the proposition that certain cycles are not inevitable, at least in the 'short term'. We discussed the prime example in class today: the repetition of history concerning cycles of power and atrocity.
James Tiptree/ Alice Bradley Sheldon's short story We Who Stole the Dream exemplifies the idea that this pattern is inevitable, yet it contains all the necessary elements which I believe, if properly capitalized on, could prevent the pattern from repeating itself. 
*disclaimer: This is not a lit review/fully flushed lit analysis or SIS final paper, so my arguments are shortened to their basics, but if you want to chat to discuss it more in depth, hit me up* 
1) Find allies within the system
       - Tiptree describes one Terran on page 368 who appears sympathetic to the Joilani situation. This shows that not all Terrans are hopeless brutes. If Joilani continued to find people like that Terran and created a group of allies from within the Terran system, sustainable change could have been made to topple the Terran's system of Joilani mistreatment from within the system itself. 
       - Proof that this works in real life: The abolitionist movement in the United States. Movements for women's equality within organized religion. 
2) Justice and retribution
       - Tiptree acknowledges issues of lingering hate and hurt between oppressors and the oppressed when she describes how some Joilani needlessly killed cornered Terrans on page 377. If the need for justice and retribution is realized and addressed by both parties in a fair and equivocal manner, this can prevent cycles of problems occurring due to lingering resentment.
       -Proof this works in real life: https://youtu.be/G422U9faPSg 
3) Empower the subjugated
       - In We Who Stole the Dream, this is symbolized with nourishing the young Joilani with the Terran food and witnessing the positive effects it has on the physical size of the children. Those with a history of subjugation need to be given the resources to reach an 'equal' playing field. This could take the form of representation in the government, accessible education, affordable housing, or even an assured avenue for employment.
      - Applied in real life: Obviously many cultures have struggled with this part as particularly evident in the United States. Nevertheless, that does not mean the U.S. has failed to make any strides to meet this need, hence affirmative action and EEOC policy. The situation for most previously subjugated people is far from perfect, but each stride towards empowering those people is a step in the right direction. 
4) Reminder of the mistakes of the past
        -There was the potential for the elder Joilani and the Terran ship the Dream to have played this part in the Joilani empire. Unfortunately, in the story, the 'new' Joilani focus on using the ship not as a symbol of what will occur if the Joilani do not watch their actions, but as a source of information to build their empire, and they shun the symbol of the inevitable effects of their actions (the 'old' Joilani) in an isolated area separated from the rest of society.
       -Example of the use of symbols and remembrances of past atrocities: https://www.ushmm.org/
5) Religion/Values
       - The Joilani value of sharing, depicted on 372, could have easily been used as a tool for preventing a society committing atrocities that they so abhorred in the past. Unfortunately, as h0lt mentioned in class, religion/moral values of a society are often misused to perpetuate violence that in their essence, they actually condemn. This dichotomy is represented in the discord between Bislat and Jivadh at the end of the story. Nevertheless, if cultural values or religion is employed in the process of enacting change or fighting cultural violence, the change will be much more sustainable.
        Proof in real life: Making Peace with Faith: The Challenges of Religion and Peacebuilding edited by Michelle Garred & Mohammed Abu-Nimer 

I remember a comment from one of peers that was along the lines of "talking theory is great, but in the end discussing it is not going to make a change." I feel as important as learning theory is, I have noticed in our class that elongated discussion of it tends to foster feelings of hopelessness and pessimistic views of the suck-i-ness of society. Valid as that is, and important as it is to acknowledge, I hope that in conversations in the future, we will allow ourselves to imagine a ridiculously ideal society and begin to ask ourselves what would need to be done in order to get there. For this Holiday season, give yourself the gift of (very possibly) idealistic, positive thinking; put the hopelessness in a box and compartmentalize it.

Culture Hierarchy vs. Diversity -- Holiday Edition

The blog question this week presents a very interesting—yet potentially controversial—set of ideas. I think the claim presented in the blog question regarding Todorov's focus on the other rather than on the effects of different cultural practices is profound and is an important distinction to make. So, to offer my own opinion, yes there are some cultural practices that are simply superior to others. This can be easily supported in certain cases such as in arguing that cultures practicing cannibalistic diets, and human sacrifices in modern times can be described as inferior. Beyond that, things start to get a little messy, yet not completely unmanageable.

First off, while it may be possible to collect enough empirical evidence about the effects of certain cultural practices and therefore compare them to each other, any conclusion that could be made would likely call for an extensive amount of knowledge of the totality of the context in which the practice is prevalent. What I mean by this is that it is very impractical to expect to empirically collect data of one cultural practice being "better" or "superior" to another. However, it may be possible to collect empirical evidence to suggest that a certain practice has a positive correlation with human longevity while a different practice has a less strong correlation with it, or something similar to that analysis. 

The second thing to consider is whether or not its a good idea to even begin to categorically suggest that cultural practices of others are inferior to one's own. As we all should know, this type of us vs. them or superiority complex has led to the oppression of many groups of people in history and often no good comes of this type of unprovoked, categorical negative assessment of others. This inspires the question: Can an individual practice a certain culture, personally dismissing alternatives, without subordinating those who practice said alternatives?

I believe the answer is yes, these two things can be mutually exclusive. I understand the argument that by conducting oneself in accordance with a certain practice, they inherently dismiss other practices and therefore believe these other practices to be inferior. However, I don't think that this is always true. I believe an individual could conduct themselves in a certain way simply because they are most used to doing things that way and have a deep personal connection to the cultural practices they participate in. Just because I don't celebrate the holiday of Christmas, for example, doesn't mean I have to believe that Christmas is an inferior holiday to Chanukkah. In fact, Christmas is a much more significant holiday to Christians than Chanukah is to Jews—if measuring the holiday by its importance within the respective religious group, Chanukah is clearly the less important one. Nevertheless, Chanukah is the holiday I gladly, joyfully, and meaningfully practice. This isn't to say that I think Christmas is a superior cultural practice, rather the comparison of the two is more like a comparison of apples to oranges and therefore I can practice the holiday while also happily wishing a Merry Christmas to Christians without a conflict of interest. If, for example, I wanted to make the claim that latkes are better tasting than Christmas fruit cake, I could probably garner a lot of support, but this conclusion is yet again a matter of opinion. 

Really, what everything boils down to is how strong the opinion of the majority is regarding a specific cultural practice. Let's say there was a winter holiday practiced by some minor religious sect in which at dawn on the day of the annual holiday the members of said sect gathered together, drank a glass of cow milk each, killed and ate five randomly selected community members between the ages of 12-14, and then sang a hymn, we could likely agree as a majority that this holiday is explicitly inferior to both Chanukah and Christmas. 

The problematic thing about using the standard baseline of the "opinion of the majority" is that this often changes. At one point in history in the United States, the majority opinion may have been that Chanukah is an inferior holiday because the Jewish people are inferior people. Just like, at one point in history the practice of homosexuality was seen by the majority as inferior to the practice of heterosexuality. In fact, and this one might really mess with everyone's heads, both of these opinions may still  be the majority opinion in some places in our country, if not nationally. That's why this question is so hard to answer and why giving an empirical value to the effects of a practice aren't objective. Heck, if the majority of US citizens believe cannibalism was an okay thing to do at some point in the future for some reason, then the idea that it is inhumane or has effects that are detrimental in some way to society could also change.

Objectivity vs. Subjectivity and other philosophical dichotomies or spectrums such as these I am dealing with in relation to this weeks blog question are undoubtedly intriguing to think about and discuss, yet I think the most important thing to take away from this whole exercise is this: treat other cultures and other people with respect, tolerance, and a willingness to learn from them whenever possible. Instead of trying to make a categorical claim about a practice being inferior or superior, make a personal decision about what to do and don't let your own opinion about which practice is right for you allow you to harbor hateful prejudice that affects your interaction with others. 

Who Knows ?

“Difference with equality” is a concept that I do not think fully exists in the way that it is isolated within this context. This is because the idea of equality includes having the same status, rights, and opportunities whereas the complete definition of the difference is that of having variations of these same aspects. However, the root of the post is to look at whether the knowledge of effects delegitimizes the moral force of different questions. While there is a difference between the statements of opinion and those more empirically based. However, reverting to the “inspiration” behind this question and the two examples of flat-earthers and anti-vaxxers, I agree with the points made in that post, stating the difference is on whether individuals are harmed as a result of ignorance. 

Within Todorov’s three axes, epistemic, axiological, and praxeological, I feel that them being seen as equivalent is not the way realistic to how they realistically progress. Looking at them about knowledge, the lowest and simplest form of interaction between “others” would be the lack of knowledge and therefore epistemic. The next level would be labeling this ignorance and unawareness through axiological forms. The hierarchy ends with a more direct exchange between the two groups, in search of knowledge or with an awareness of individual bias, ignorance, or naivety through the praxeological axis. 

In general, I believe that the world is seeing a trend of praxeological mindsets where knowledge of effects is promoted, while it is still accepted for a party to not be as factual if they are aware of their perspective being dictated solely by values. With this, we should be looking to continue furthering research for the areas of ignorance that inflict harm on others. However, there will always be different perspectives that see issues as being both empirical or inaccurate based on factors of upbringing and beliefs. Moreover, the debates of religion and opinions of many social issues cannot be completely refuted, and should not be delegitimized because there is personal evidence that factualizes these beliefs. Conversely, beliefs that cause harm or damage to individuals or have more negative effects than not, should be better supported with morals as well as factual events. 

I still think there are many layers to this question that can be further answered with more exploration on both the axes as well as how they can be applied to the concept of “difference with equality” and other varied questions alike.

Without Representation

As a member of the Republic of China, we are huge fans of I-Kiribati, especially after their recognition and acceptance of our newly implemented One China policy (Wikipedia). However, the first issue we had to address was the fact that we deserve to take over the dredging contract, despite what Van Oort says about their experienced dredging. One thing that one should think about before siding with such a company is the fact that they were accused of dumping illegal waste near Indonesia, which resulted in one of their dredgers being seized (Maritime Bulletin). How can one trust a company that is having their dredgers seized to successfully carry out a dredging project. Furthermore, if sustainable dredging is what we are aiming for, Van Oort the waste dumping company cannot be trusted to maintain an environmentally friendly dredging plan. Their efforts will leave Kiribati as an ongoing project and the I-Kiribati people will never have a chance to get back to their beloved land of Kiribati. As a country, we have reflected our concern and care for the I-Kiribati people China is concerned not only for the project of dredging, but also and most importantly for the safety and well-being of the I-Kiribati people who support our one China policy, which has been respected through our economic aid we’ve been providing Kiribati with (Wikipedia).

Overall, I felt that the simulation was very confusing and it was hard to get all of our ideas out with the set-up. I did enjoy hearing the creative conversation, and watching my classmates execute their gift of debate. One thing that really struck me about simulation two, was the fact that dredging was such a dominant factor in the discussion and not the people of I-Kiribati. If there were more focus on the people of Kiribati, the transformation of our policy would have been even more time consuming because of the debate that would have ensued over human rights. If an I-Kiribati representative were present, then there would be a better communication around what the I-Kiribati people really need and want from outsiders trying to help. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/China%E2%80%93Kiribati_relations

https://maritimebulletin.net/2019/04/10/dutch-dredger-seized-for-alleged-waste-dumping/

Now we all know what sustainable dredging is!

This simulation could be agreed on being one word- sustainable. Sustainable in a different sense because the class was ever persistent in prolonging (or sustaining) the debate and analysis of dredging to go on for quite literally, infinity.
My group with Molly and Kiran represented the South Pacific Business Development. Between sitting in the back and not saying a word for the entire 7000-minute long conversation about dredging, many of my friends asked afterward what was up… well, here it is.
As a microfinance group, our main motives were formulated around the people and our integration plan, which unfortunately got shut down quick, thanks to EJF. We chose not to speak during the dredging debate as it was secondary to our primary focus and by mentioning our opinion, we feared our main motives would then be glossed over. We wanted to keep in line by only mentioning and speaking directly on the issues that the SPBD does and did not want dredging to appear as a primary concern of ours. Additionally, by hearing the other groups' perspectives on this issue, we were able to spend time revising our amendment in attempts to make it fit within the guidelines followed by each group. Although our amendment was not discussed long, I was glad it was able to be mentioned as it represented the SPBD and summarized our strategy document in the best way possible. It would have been interesting to see more of what the other groups thought of it and possible revisions that could have been made, however, I am glad our group was able to mention the SPBD’s main objectives, even if it only lasted 2 minutes of discussion.
Something I enjoyed most about this simulation is how authentic each group was to their motivations as a country or organization. In attempts to follow suit, the South Pacific Business Development has pre-existing work with both China and Japan, as well as an interlocking base with many institutions similar to the other groups present at the simulation. This is why our amendment was proposed with the hopes of involving all the other groups, as a microfinance project does not stand alone and needs sponsors, funding, and support from countless organizations and countries. Overall I appreciated the structure of this simulation as it felt more natural and relaxed, as opposed to the previous simulation. My only wish would be that we had more time to genuinely discuss more issues… and maybe we could have added another word!

Blog Post #12: How we judge

This new type of framing of "knowledge of the other" versus "knowledge of the effects of different cultural practices" is very interesting when thinking about the ways we pass judgement on those with these different cultural practices. I think that it's actually very important for us to shift from thinking about these differences through a moral lens to better-supported empirical claims.

There will always be judgement passed on people seen as "the other" who engage in these different cultural practices, but by framing them more as empirical claims it is more productive in a way. If you think about this in terms of the human sacrifice example, by just saying it's wrong, there is a moral judgement passed and a strong superiority/inferiority relationship implied. However, by framing it more as an "inefficient way to organize a political system with long-term instability," it allows for people to really think about what is being said and what the implications of human sacrifice are. This allows for less of a moral judgement, but rather a factual judgement that proves this is wrong. There is still a superiority/inferiority implication as one group is still saying this is wrong, but it allows for more of a discussion surrounding the topic.

Even though this is a better way to pass judgement on others, this is still a reassertion of the kinds of hierarchies that Todorov argues that we need to call into question. I don't, however, see how we can get rid of these hierarchies as there is always this concept of superiority and inferiority involved with passing judgement. We see this a lot with members of the developed world passing judgement on members of the developing world. Countries like the United States can make so many judgements on practices like gender roles in countries in the developing world and simply say these are wrong and there needs to be more equality. This reinforces this hierarchy, with the developed world thinking they are superior to the developing world, even though they haven't experienced the challenges and cultural practices of that country. Playing into this, I don't think there can be the correct dismissal of alternatives because it comes down to the sheer cultural differences between the two groups. You can't ever truly dismiss someone else's ideas because you haven't lived their life and don't have the cultural experiences to make that claim.

To bring this back to Todorov's three axes of alterity, I don't think they can be mutually exclusive. The axiological level of value judgements will always exist between two entities as these cultural practices create differences which cause each of them to pass judgement on the different practices. In terms of the epistemic level, this knowledge of the other's cultural practices can never be "perfect" in a sense because judgement will always be passed as one continues to learn and compare different practices. The only way this judgement can be mitigated is by framing them as more empirical claims to generate discussions about the issues and work to eliminate the moral component.

Reflection Week #14

So this Thanksgiving was really different than last year and it's something I've been thinking about a lot and want to reflect on. Just as a precursor, this is going to be a pretty personal post briefly discussing death and suicide.

So last year, my cousin Purple was alive. Last year, my ex-boyfriend Matt spent some time with my family on Thanksgiving. Last year, my cat Ambrose was still alive. Last year, I was a senior in high school and still living at home. This year, all of that was different. 

I am still working through a lot of pain associated with the loss of Purple, who committed suicide in April. I still don't think I know the full extent of what I'm feeling, but it's something that I'm trying to give myself space for. It's also making it very important for me to spend time with family and share the grief and love that we feel even more. 

Breaking up with Matt has been emotionally difficult and I am still working through all of my feelings. I am, however, coming to terms with the fact that he's always going to hold a special place in my heart and I'm always going to care about him, even when I'm trying to move on. 

The loss of Ambrose has also been hard, especially on my other cat Barnaby. It makes me more thankful that I still have him to cuddle up next to and pet when I need a little comforting. 

The immense amount of change that I've experienced over this summer and now after almost a full semester of college has been a lot to handle, but I'm thankful for the community I've started to build at AU and I know I'm starting to build my home here. 

I am still dealing with a lot of personal issues and I'm not getting help right now which is something I know I'm going to need to make a priority once finals are over. I am a work in progress and will always be a work in progress. I'm so incredibly thankful for my entire support system, be it my immediate and extended family who never fail to comfort me and hold me up when I'm down, or my high school friends who are either right down the street or 3,000 miles away and who will always laugh and love with me, or my new family at AU who have brought me so many new experiences and continue to make me feel less alone in a place that is so easy to feel isolated. 

I cannot truly express my gratitude for the people that surround me and help to make me who I am because without them I wouldn't be half the person I am.

Adaptation -- Week 14

Before I delve into the topic for this week, I want to follow up on last week's reflection post about trying to talk about the history of Thanksgiving. When I actually brought up the topic with a few family friends, the conversation drifted quickly to the idea that the victors write history. This then turned into a debate in which one of my particularly chaos-loving cousins decided to play devils advocate and contend that (maybe not so jokingly)the Sons of Liberty were literally terrorists and that many British people were assaulted and cold-bloodily harassed by colonists in the pre-Revolutionary War time period. The basic premise that was being argued after dinner was whether or not the colonists would have been historically referred to as ruthless, overly-violent terrorists if they had lost the Revolutionary war. This then began to craft a conversation in which a younger cousin innocently (probably without realizing the depth of implication he had employed) suggested that if victors write history that is in some way bias, might certain truths that we take for granted historically OR presently, be false in actuality? That's when collectively the family decided to break out the pie and avoid a rabbit hole of intellectual debate (or torture and warfare as its referred to at the Thanksgiving dinner table).

So, back to my topic for the week--adaptation. It occurred to me before leaving to come home this week that I had really been at college for over three months, and it had already become natural to my way of life. Only a very small part of my entire life has been spent here at AU, but right now it feels like everything. Back at home, seeing my family, living in my own house, sleeping in my own bed, frequenting old hometown favorites with my old hometown friends: it all felt surreal. At many times I felt like I was living someone else's life, or maybe reliving a previous lifetime of my own. However, by the time the short, chaotic, action-packed break came to a close, I felt like I was used to this old lifestyle and to the surroundings of my home. Now, back at AU once again, I feel that same uncomfortable feeling that I felt when arriving home for the first time. I know that in the next couple weeks that feeling will shake off and be replaced with a cycle of finals-related stress, only to be gained back again when I go home for winter break.

If that last paragraph seemed like a crazy, mumbo-jumbo whirlwind, that's because it was and I intended for it to be that way. The chaos and constant change a college student such as myself experiences during this time is more than enough to completely disorient and unsteady someone. Somehow, us as young humans are very good at a particular skill: adaptation. When I realized how much I've been forced to adapt, change, and reflect in my recent life, I became quite proud of my ability to be flexible in regard to instrumental changes in life, and I hope this is a skill I retain even when I'm not the same naive young freshman.

Pre and Post Thanksgiving Thoughts

Pre-Thanksgiving Reflection:

Lesson plan idea for last class --
Step one: Split up into groups of 3 or 4
Step two: Each group chooses a current event of their liking (Hong Kong protests, new technology advancement, etc)
Step three: Each group then finds at least two reports, blogs, videos, and/or news articles on the topic
Step four: categorize the articles (based on the descriptions on pg 230) if the reading/video most closely aligns to Duran, Motolinia, or Sahagun writing.
Step five: answer questions in a small group-- 1) How did that particular style affect your opinion of the topic?     2) Is it good, bad, necessary?   3) Why did the author use that particular style?     4) Are there certain times when one style is necessary/ more prone to be used than another?
Step six: Come back as a large group. 2 minutes for each group to present their findings
Step seven: Discuss as a group: Is Todorov successful in fullfilling his goal on page 247? How much does his writing style differ from Duran, Motolinia, or Sahagun?
Goals: Todorov does a critical analysis of other writers, and he claims to be different. This class is an opportunity to apply the same critical lens on Todorov and have an important discussion questioning if unbiased writing/analysis if even possible. Using current events also allows us to make connections from theory and a 1939 book to modern day events.

Post-Thanksgiving Reflection:

Tips to avoid talking to family about off limit subjects, touchy issues, or topics that you know will add tension to the air --
1) Before dinner talk to your Aunts and Uncles and gather as much basic information about cool new things your cousins or other relatives are doing, so that when a possible tenuous topic risks being brought up, you can easily swerve the topic to something your grandparents/ family is obligated to be interested in.
Example: *comments are being made that risk touchy issues being brought up*
You: Hey Cousin John, I heard you just started track season, how is that going?
--It is best to be preparing follow up question in your head as the point of deflection is talking.--
Example: You: That sounds super cool cousin John! Uncle Dave, you must enjoy going to the meets... any high lights from the season so far?
2) Plan with your family before hand. Optional determination of a safety word. Make sure every member of the family is aware of which topics are off limits. That way when such topic arises you have a group of people backing each other up and using their collective brains to figure out how to steer the topic away from that subject or feign an issue that you simply must go deal with now.
3) Bring games and activities.
4) If the topic cannot be avoided, but you have to much dignity to pretend that you agree, but you also don't want a fight to break out: practice "matching the affect." This is a good therapy technique in almost any situation, but it also comes in handy at family gatherings as well. In simple description, matching the affect means, rather than reasoning with someone, you say things like "Wow, that must be super frustrating for you" or "Gosh, I see why that annoys you." Usually when a person feels empathized with, it diffuses the tensions in the air, and it minimizes the risk of the topic arising again because of the individual feeling like they were not heard.

Queue up "Christmas Hits"

It is  officially Christmas season so as many may expect, given my namesake, I will be going HARD. 

Thanksgiving break happened… it has never been my favorite holiday and it was especially isolated as all my family is scattered around the country so it was just my mom and I and our little tofurkey (which was amazing, I recommend Tofurkey to everyone). I did get to watch Frozen II (again!) and the new Mr. Rodgers movie.. as well as the entire new season of The Crown, so it was a successful break for TV and films! I also got to spend a couple hours with my best friend and the huge hugs her family gave me made it feel so much more like home, in addition to the bruise on my arm developing from her football tackle when we first saw each other. I got to FaceTime my sister with my mom a bunch to see the holiday decorations in Disney World and hear more about the “behind the scenes”. Although she will also be missing Christmas too which is definitely unfortunate, Disney and Christmas are my two favorite thinks so it just set me up to start getting more excited for Christmas. 

Christmas is arguably the best time of the year and I truly just love all the days leading up to the actual 26th more than anything as people are so much friendlier. Especially in New Jersey… we need that friendliness!  I do wish they didn’t need an old guy in a red suit to spread joy, but I guess pickers can’t be choosers. I also love making gifts for people and cannot wait to get some fun AU/DC gifts for my friends and family. 

I am SO excited to be back with this American family for the next two weeks, even though it is finals time (*screams*). The days off of school were a nice calm before the storm of an insane amount of essays and the craziness of the end of the semester. I am definitely not looking forward to the impending showers of stress and anxiety. 

It is also insane to think that the semester and all my classes will be over after these next weeks. Time has flown by and I cannot imagine not having World Politics every week! WIth that, I’m looking forward to the simulation this week and how it will be a different experience to our previous one. At the time of this post, there are 23 days, 10 hours, and 24 minutes until Christmas…. 

Can You Love Without Understanding?: Reflection 14

In 2019, the romantic perception of love is represented in many ways. Love seems to have less limitations than ever before. In the age of interracial and diverse dating people are loving without fear of social ramifications. Also, the public shaming of things that were once deemed to be unconventional or taboo is not condemned by mainstream western progressiveness. However, people still tend to have an unhealthy relationship with the  concept and handling of “other”. This is because societal and cultural norms often determine what is and isn’t within one's normal parameters of understanding. While waiting for our Thanksgiving meal to be completed, I sat with a few distant family members who were exchanging deep thoughts concerning the culture of PWI (Predominately White Institutions) and the impact is has on the “others”. One important point I heard mentioned was the fact that it is easy for environments like these to simply “tolerate” the presence of minority students rather than fully embracing them for the sake of diversity. Just tolerating an individual or a group of people inhibits true inclusivity; therefore pointing to the fact that true love requires understanding depending on the degree of love. 

Love has many levels, which waver depending on the context. For example, the love a man show’s for his wife differs from the gesture of love shown to a street child when he decides to buy them a meal.  In the case of the love shown towards the “other”, the level of love needed to coexist with true inclusivity this cannot be achieved without truly making an effort to understand the complexity of the other. Simply tolerating the existence of another human can be done in an atmosphere of hate because tolerance also has its levels. Just because someone tolerates someone does not mean they respect the individual. When true love is being shown, then similarities and differences are celebrated in many forms. This can be shown through the acknowledging of the other’s beliefs, uniqueness, and customs. This leads me to wonder how the U.S can manage to provide an environment for all that doesn’t just tolerate the “other”?

Holiday Grief: YouTube Reflection 13

I sit here listening to ‘ A Motown Christmas’  with my Andes mint green sheet over my head like a hood, which I utilize  to mask my tears from my curious roommate. She bursts into laughter at my unusual behavior, and then proceeds to question my condition, and in the calmest voice I could muster, I tell her,  “I am fine”. I began to scroll through the comment section, as it is usually the most entertaining part of YouTube. That was when I read Linda’s comment, and I burst into tears because it made me reflect on the fact that this is the second Christmas that I haven’t been able to enjoy with my Pawpaw. I feel as if I am being held against my will from the right to enjoy the joyous part of the holiday because though my grandpa always came across as a very serious individual, he always showed so much love during the holiday season through his cakes, prayers, and the iconic playing of his gently worn keyboard that he would carry with him to every communal family gathering in Milford, Ohio. I love my Pawpaw, and the fact that I can no longer enjoy holidays with him, is unfair, but it won’t change even if I begged God for it to change.  I believe that the part of Linda’s comment that says “It helps me get through the holidays” is very profound because it points to the need for community in our human existence. I wish I didn’t have to just “get through” the holidays, but reality doesn’t honor our every wish, but religious people say that God hears those wishes, but they rephrase it as “prayers”. 

Linda’s picture, if it is her, reflects that her years on this earth are worn. She’s not as young as I am, but maybe she is a revelation of what is to come. Linda’s comment also sends a call to action to those who may read her post saying, “Everyone grab this and embrace it, so we can have that Love all over again”. There will come a time where all we have are songs and memories to help us cherish the memories and preserve the love we have for those we love when they’re gone. Grief is unfortunately an ongoing process that will continue to haunt us as our days on this earth number. I hope that Holidays become more bearable for my family and I, as it seems that death calls for unpredictable change that one is forced to cope with. To anyone who has ever lost a loved one, and finds it hard to get through the holidays because of it, remember if we cherish the moments and hold the memory of their existence dearly, we will be able to “Love all over again, forever”!

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVf8L6zvBfE

Commemoration: What is it all about? -- Week 13

My family has a lot of birthdays in November, including mine which happens to be next weekend. While my birthday has never been an extravagant occasion, I've at least had the experience (as almost everyone in the US does) to claim some type of ownership to a 24-hour span of time. To "sanctify" , almost, an entire day for myself and others to reflect on the fact that I do, indeed, exist. When described like this, the idea of a birthday seems to shift from a common simple way of life to a curious societal phenomenon. Why give any sort of relevance to a specific date simply because of its random association with past events?

Thanksgiving is also right around the corner and is yet another exemplar annual event for my curiosity. Despite its controversial history, the holiday itself has been around for so long with traditions that have ingrained themselves into the calendar. The holiday season is again another example of traditions born of the commemoration of past events. Sometimes, people forget the relevance of the traditions in the first place. Conversely, the relevance of a calendar date isn't usually realized without some sort of traditional commemoration.

Obviously, my brief and stupid attempt to be philosophical about the origins of "holidays" is something that may be pretty self-explanatory or simply useless to ponder over, but I also feel a profound sense of encouragement (after reasoning through this) to use each holiday or special anniversary to really reflect on the relevance of the event in the first place. This thanksgiving at the dinner table, I'll be thinking of Todorav and attempting to discuss it without starting too much chaos with the family and friends... we'll see how that goes.

Reflection 12: Education Policy Implimentation

A month ago I attended an EmpowerEd teacher’s summit. In one of the seminars that  focused on teacher retention, I was honored to become acquainted with a member of AU’s faculty named Prof. Kotsyo, who gave me the opportunity to observe one of his graduate classes on Education Implementation and what that looks like in the real world. I had the opportunity to interact with some of his graduate students (majority of them were education professionals) and participate in the class activity, which included a gallery walk of challenges associated with policy implementation at different levels of the education policy hierarchy: school, state, federal,  and district. Across the board some of the challenges that overlapped across the levels of the policy implementation included: change in administration, funding, and teacher’s leaving the profession. 

Experiencing education professionals discuss the challenges of implementation of education policy was a very thought provoking experience because it puts the reality of the state of our nation’s education in perspective. From a first hand account, I have seen the effects of teachers leaving the profession and the toll it takes on the educational body of students. It disrupts the crucial bond of trust required for a successful and healthy student-teacher relationship because if the students lack trust in their educator, then their learning suffers. Being a teacher is way more than just a title or a 9 to 5 job, it is a life-altering interaction between the student and the teacher. It was inspiring to be in a room with educators who genuinely believe in the success and the lives of their students. This experience has even pushed me to think that I most likely want to experience being an ESL teacher because it would allow me to bring my interest in building cross-cultural relationships to reality.

It was a cold week (the wind is insane & Frozen II came out).

This week marked the official turning point of the semester where classes are winding down, final assignments are posted, and my “to-do” list has doubled in size. In combination with going home, I am a bit overwhelmed, to say the least. 

A large portion of this week was filled with my Space Force essay… which is 99% new from my first draft, so I will be crossing my fingers that it is at least a little better. I find Conquest of America a whole different experience than our other readings. For starters, I and some other Global Scholars in the 1st year seminar, “Globalization and the New Monroe Doctrine”, were assigned to read both 1491 and 1493 by Charles Mann. These books focused on the conquest of the Americas while venturing into many global implications as the years passed. It has been interesting to note the differences between these authors' rhetorics and the information they each presented. So far I have noticed that Todorov integrates more primary source accounts into his speech whereas Mann was an avid supporter of summaries and footnotes. I think I have enjoyed Todorov’s work more as it is more concise while still getting the main ideas across, additionally, I appreciate how he explores La Casas in comparison to Cortes and Columbus. This book has caused me to question more the role and exchange between morality and politics in international relations, as well as how all historical accounts are inherently biased in a multitude of different ways. As Todorov compared the ways that these explorers looked at the Indians through different lenses, I got a better sense of how drastic these accounts can be. 

This weekend I got to see Frozen II with a couple of friends, and as an avid Disney fan, I would say this movie is pushing the best that Disney has ever produced. I immediately texted my sister (who works at Disney) to pick up all the Frozen II goods for me with her employer's discount. Between this movie and watching The Good Dinosaur this week, Disney has been working its magic to refuel me. Basically, Spot is the best animated Disney character and this Frozen II soundtrack is going to be on repeat for the rest of the year.

Reflection Week #13

This week was packed with school work, theater, and anticipation for going home for Thanksgiving, but there was a very present theme of native peoples and their culture.

On Wednesday I attended a panel organized by AU's American Studies department called "Indigenous Lives in the DC Area." The panelists consisted of Dr. Gabrielle Tayac, a historian with the Smithsonian National Museum of the American Indian and member of the Piscataway Nation from Southern Maryland, Ashley Minner, a community artist and organizer of the Lumbee Tribe of North Carolina, and Dr. Elizabeth Rule, a CAS Post-Doctoral Fellow and enrolled citizen of the Chickasaw Nation. The panel itself was very interesting, shedding light on the rich past and present cultures of native peoples in the DC area from many different perspectives. A common theme they discussed was the dehumanization of Native Americans that was caused by being invisible, and that was something that I was able to relate to the book The Conquest of America. Dr. Tayac specifically spoke about how the history of Native Americans is hard to find because history isn't written by them which leads to their invisibility, and that's something that Todorov struggles with too. He is forced to rely on journals and other sources from the conquerors' perspective because there aren't really any sources from the "Indians" that are being conquered. He recognizes this on page 54, saying that "given the absence of native writings, they are all subsequent to the conquest and therefore influenced by the conquerors." He doesn't really have any choice in using them though, and so he writes that we can't "read these texts as transparent statements, but [must] try at the same time to take into account the action and circumstances of their utterance" (54). Dr. Tayac mentioned that her work on collecting and preserving native peoples' history involved working with elders in native communities as the keepers of knowledge and I found that to be an incredible way of shaping the narrative of native peoples' history.

Another somewhat unexpected way in which conflict and native peoples surfaced was in Frozen II. This is NOT a spoiler! In the movie there are two groups: those from Arendelle, Anna and Elsa's kingdom, and we learn that there's another group of people in the Enchanted Forest called the Northuldra. The Northuldra and the Arendellians have been at war in the Enchanted Forest because Anna and Elsa's grandfather decided he wanted to destroy the Northuldra by limiting their resources because of their connection to magic. The way their grandfather and the other Arendellians at the time went about limiting their resources by pretending to be friends and then attacking them out of nowhere reminded me of the actions of the Spaniards in The Conquest of America. The native peoples did not know who the Spaniards were, the threat they posed, or what they even wanted, and just like that they were conquered and subject to torture. It was a very one-sided attack, just like in Frozen II with the attack on the Northuldra.

It's definitely been interesting to learn and talk about native people more since it's not a topic that I discuss often, but I think it's really important to be able to have these conversations because there are still so many injustices facing Native Americans in our country to this day. I hope that through these discussions people become more aware of these systematic issues and we can talk about ways in which to address them on a national level.