Reflection Week #10

My body is basically falling apart at this point. Last week I had to go to the ER for my ear, and this week I had a fever and now a pretty bad cough.

There is really nothing worse than being debilitatingly sick in college. Over the course of my fever, pretty much all I did was lay in bed. I did minimal work and spent most of my time watching Designated Survivor, listening to music, and resting. I haven't had a fever in a while so I was definitely considered very sick by my standards. Even though I wasn't doing much and didn't really need "help," I think I was missing someone else taking care of me and having basically all the responsibility of making the decisions of what medicines I was going to take or if I was going to go see the doctor. My roommate Nadia did "mother me" in some aspects, but it wasn't the same and I didn't really realize how much stress I had been under until I got home on Thursday and my dad started taking care of me. It really is something we take for granted when we live at home.

Over the weekend, we did go to New York City for my great aunt's annual Diwali party. My dad wasn't so sure we should go, but I insisted because I wanted to see friends and family. We weren't there for long at all but it was nice to see friends I hadn't seen in years, and family I hadn't seen in months. It helps to remind me I have such a strong support system, even if I'm not physically with everyone who's a part of it. Something that I've found interesting is that since I've been in college, my ideas of home are becoming muddled between Takoma Park and New York City. I find myself briefly mixing up where memories took place or where things are located in relation to each other. I'm not sure if this is because I'm developing a new home on campus and so my other two primary homes are becoming less defined, or if this is some memory thing in my brain that is becoming muddled, but I definitely want to look into it more.

I only went to my classes two days this week because of my sickness, but something that I realized was how much I actually like small group discussions. I've always known I preferred them, but on Monday I recognized that the reason I like them so much is because I feel less stressed because I can bare my thoughts to a small group of people and then refine them more. I definitely think it's good to know what my stress triggers are so that I can know how to deal with them better in the future, and now I can recognize that large group discussions are because I'm not confident in my preliminary thoughts.

Honestly, I'm not sure why I have such a bad cough and really hope it goes away soon so that I can catch up in all my classes, but that remains to be seen. Here's to hoping my health at least somewhat improves!